Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts

Saturday, April 14, 2012

"A Proper News & Information Site for Serious Adult Play?"

This question was asked (in long form) in the Adult section of the official Second Life forum.

Are there blogs reviewing Second Life adult products and places?

I don't know yet if there is a one-stop niche shop, but I did ask the OP if she'd seen any of these sites:





Link to the original post:  http://community.secondlife.com/t5/General-Discussion/A-Proper-News-amp-Information-Site-for-Serious-Adult-Play/td-p/1480359

Related post link:  http://community.secondlife.com/t5/General-Discussion/Is-there-a-blogging-circle-I-can-add-my-blog-to/m-p/1324783
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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Where do YOU think the best place to talk about sex in Second Life is and why?

I asked this question on the official Second Life Forum (SLF), SLUniverse (SLU) and gotVirtual (gV) this week and probably about a year or more ago on RLetc.

This is the question in more detail.

"Where are the best places (blogs, forums, websites, sims, etc.) to talk about sex in Second Life among adults with a frank and open discussion and information that is updated and kept current? Topics might include prim genitalia, etiquette, how-to for newbies, fetishes, paraphilias, NSFW & XXX content, sex sims, sex products, etc. And why? (Why is that the best place?) The question came up in the "Finding Current Info on SL Sex" thread on SLF and I thought it might be interesting to get comments and referrals and maybe collect them into a helpful resource list. Thank you in advance and apologies for dupes."

I say it came up in that thread, and it did, but the truth is, I've been looking for a forum in which to have conversations with topics like the ones in this blog for about two years.  It has turned out to be a slightly more complex question that I had first thought it would be.

Anyway, here are some of the answers I received.

I'll start with the helpful, direct link type answers.


  1. SLUniverse (SLU).  Multiple votes for this forum, some qualified.  There are restrictions on content and many people have complained about judgmental or joking responses, but you do have the advantage of a large group of tenured and knowledgeable Second Life residents who can answer many product and tech questions.
  2. The "Let's Make Sexy Time!" Social Group on SLUniverse.  Eighty-seven threads, current content, some sex and a lot of humor and poking and joking around.
  3. The "BDSM Interest group" Social Group on SLUniverse.  Three hundred seventy-four threads, current content, a lot of sex and helpful discussions about Second Life sex products and places.  More straight answers and acceptance and less joking and poking in this Social Group.  I would feel comfortable recommending this Social Group to people wanting a venue for discussing sex in Second Life.
  4. gotVirtual (gv).  Multiple qualified votes for this forum.
  5. The official Second Life forum (SLF).  Multiple votes with qualifiers.  This is the company's product forum, it includes teens and it is PG.  You can't use vulgar language like "fuck" and you cannot post nude or lewd pics.  You do have the advantage of a large group of tenured and knowledgeable Second Life residents who can answer many product and tech questions.  My observation has been that a person asking questions on SLF is likely to get inworld IMs offering help too.
  6. BDSM forum inworld sim.  Multiple votes for this place.
  7. Xcite!  Xcite! is a Second Life product site.  Good information specific to their product line.
  8. Between two consenting adults.  Multiple votes.
  9. A couple of people said they did not want to share what they had managed to learn on their own the hard way.
  10. This blog right here.



It was in the "BDSM Interest group" Social Group that I found this helpful stickied thread about the rules on SLU regarding adult content.

Cristiano said on SLU...
"A reminder about NSFW images and thread titles"
"If the image contains nudity or is otherwise sexually explicit, it must not be posted inline with IMG tags or attached to the post. You must link to the image. Courtesy would also be to warn that the image is NSFW. If you are uncertain if an image is NSFW, err on the side of caution and assume it is."
"Please also be conscious of the content of your thread titles. While users do have the ability to ignore forums, and the group forums are viewable only by registered users, there is no ability to filter out forums on iSpy and the titles do appear some other places as well. Thank you for your cooperation with this policy. I try to provide as open of an environment as possible and I have nothing against the images or topics personally, but I do have the needs of the entire forum community, advertisers, and the policies of my ISP to keep in mind."
Nimue Jewell said on SLU...
"Keep in mind, even though the topics are adult in those subforums, you are not allowed to post naked SL or RL pictures."


I nabbed a couple of the more in-depth comments.

Ishtara Rothschild said on SFL...
"Actually, I think that is forum is a great place to talk about sex. It might seem counter-intuitive considering LL's PG rule and the relatively high level of moderation, but I've found that when it comes to adult topics, only posts with very explicit language are getting moderated. Which can be a boon rather than a bane, because it helps keep the discussion on a civilized level. We have discussed even the most controversial topics here in the past, such as age play, BDSM (including edgeplay), or zoophilia. This doesn't seem to be possible over at SLU, where people who disagree with the vocal majority (which is surprisingly conservative when it comes to sex; SLU is a place where gays and liberal atheists rage against aberrant forms of sexuality in a way that would make a Baptist preacher jealous) are met with vigorous personal attacks and the most hateful and rude language. That's exactly the kind of thing that gets deleted here, and this forum is a better place for it imho. At SLU, everything seems to be about moral outrage. A member of the in crowd starts a finger pointing thread (bruised skins and "Rape me" tattoos, OMG, how can LL allow this!) and everyone joins in the bashfest. That is not a discussion, it's a lynch mob in a feverish circle j***. Those who dare to disagree are torn to pieces and will be bullied in all future threads no matter what they post. I'd rather participate in a forum where I can speak my mind as long as I'm willing to self-censor a bit and use medical schoolbook terms or romanticized language rather than colloquialisms."
Knowl Paine said on SLF...
"The best place is with your partner(s). Second Life can be a journey, a path for discovery. I prefer to choose my own adventure. Sexual sophistication, is far from first on my list of ideal characteristics and traits of a desirable partner. The second best place to discuss functionality of a product or attachment is with the Creator or seller of the product. The Resident who made it, probably knows how the item works. A Group for helping Residents in the Region Kuula, has a public Show-n-Tell event, the content must be General maturity rating but a format like that for sex in SL would be beneficial."
squashy Beeswing said on SLF...
"You could dish out notecards periodically with how-to guides and best practice. :matte-motes-delicious:"

Orfeu said on gV...
"I think of the forums, gv is prolly the best fit. We do have a slight habit of constant de-rails....rather than substantive discussion here...but one can hope. Other than that....your "Thats what she said" blog, also seems to fit the bill admirably."

Saffy Pants said on gV...
"I am not sure any of them are any use for talking about SL sex. The ones that allow it are populated by people who aren't interested and the ones populated by people who are interested don't allow it. The official forum is obviously the place because it has loads of newbies who would love some sex education but as you say it would be like sex education in school with the real stuff censored out. I did my share of sex in my early SL days but I never really found anyone who could understand the kind of atmosphere I needed to create. I havent tried anything for a long time but poseballs and devices did nothing for me with the exception of Devotion and I got worn out having to do all the talking."


Additional information.

  1. Some pretty damn frank conversations about sex can be had in the Utherverse forums, but it is a company product site, so it's not really the right place for conversations that include Second Life or other virtual worlds.  Also, the Springerville and troll quotients are very high in that place.
  2. There is a Gorean Forum specific to Second Life and it is active and current.
  3. KingGoon Forums.
  4. The Alphaville Herald has a 'Sex, Cybersex and Beyond' section
  5. 2nd Sex.  It's a blog by Lillie Yifu.  Described as follows: "A blog on sex and virtual worlds by a virtual escort." Current content.  Not as much sex as you might think given the description and blog title.
  6. The Sleaze King of Second Life.  A blog by Hard Rust, the creator of Hard Alley in Second Life.
  7. Second Life porn star blogs.  Definitely adult content.
    1. Emmanuelle Jameson's Second Life.  A blog by the avatar formerly known as "Jennnnna Jameson."  Lots of sex.  Lots of erotic Second Life sex pics. 
    2. My Twisted Second Life: Diary of A Naughty TGirl.  A blog by Ivori Faith.  Sex from the second you click through the mature-content warning.
    3. Serenity And Arwen PornStar Files.
    4. Quinn Ying in Second Life.



Links:
http://community.secondlife.com
http://community.secondlife.com/t5/Lifestyles-and-Relationships/bd-p/lifestyles_relationships
http://community.secondlife.com/t5/Lifestyles-and-Relationships/Where-do-YOU-think-the-best-place-to-talk-about-sex-in-Second/td-p/1086709
http://community.secondlife.com/t5/Lifestyles-and-Relationships/Finding-Current-Info-on-SL-Sex/td-p/1081169
http://www.sluniverse.com
http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/lets-make-sexy-time/
http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/bdsm-interest-group/
http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/general-sl-discussion/64052-where-best-places-talk-second.html
http://gotvirtual.net
http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/where-are-the-best-places-to-talk-second-life-sex-mature-nsfw.2546/
http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/thats-what-she-said.772/
http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/the-naughty-thread-pics-vids-etc-there-will-be-nudity.410/
http://www.getxcite.com/
http://forums.utherverse.com
http://goreanforums.net/
http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/Can_we_have_sex
http://sexsecond.blogspot.com
http://alphavilleherald.com/news/sex-cybersex-and-beyond
http://jennnnnajameson.blogspot.com
http://ivorifaith.blogspot.com
http://quinnying.blogspot.com
http://sereandarwen.blogspot.com
http://hardrust.blogspot.com
http://www.kinggoon.net/
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Sunday, August 14, 2011

An Object Lesson in Bad Break-Ups

Here:  http://ladysakai.wordpress.com/2011/08/10/gtfo/  &  http://ladysakai.wordpress.com/2011/08/13/gtfo-part2-now-blackmail/
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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

MetaHumor of CyberSexing

I like the meta humor of this pic of avatars at their computers cybersexing online. It's from a blog site that unfortunately does not appear to have been updated since mid-2010. http://sexandlife.tk/ http://sexandlife.net/

[IMG]
Stimulating Conversations, originally uploaded by siÒ²Ò²™.

Links:
http://sexandlife.tk/
http://sexandlife.net/
http://www.flickr.com/people/sixxy/
http://www.plurk.com/_siXX_/invite
http://ry-xx.blogspot.com/
http://www.flickriver.com/groups/sexandlife/pool/
http://www.flickr.com/groups/sexandlife/
http://www.flickr.com/groups/slporn/pool/
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Virtual Black Books?

I'm gonna stick with the "Notes" tab in SL, my chat logs, this thread and my memory, but these sites are interesting in theory, if not in practice:

http://bedposted.com/
http://myblackbook.com/
http://www.tressugar.com/Do-Tell-Would-You-Use-Orgasm-Log-944307
http://orgasmlogger.com/
http://www.sexlifeapp.com/

Repost.  LeeHere Absent, Mar 11, 2011http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/thats-what-she-said.772/page-26#post-34237
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Jane's Sex Guide

Have y'all ever visited Jane's Sex Guide? The website has been around since 1997 and still has current 2011 content. The gist of the site is that a group of reviewers visit porn and erotica related sites, test them out and then write reviews that include a description of the site, a rating and then, quite helpfully, information about advertising content, pop-ups, costs and other logistical intel. They also test and review sex toys, books and services and give consumer tips.
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Ladies' Blog Out

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Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Slippery Slope

I followed some more of Lum's breadcrumbs (he sees LeeHere too, well hell, so do other people) and found this blog post from June 25, 2007 called "What if they gave an orgy, and nobody came? The open scandals of sex in the undercity," that is as relevant to this thread and sex in Second Life as anything written in 2007 about sex or Second Life is, which is to say, extremely relevant. It's written by Lillie Yifu on her Raise the Red Lantern blog which purports to be about the intimate side of Second Sex. We have a First and Second Life, why not a First and Second Sex Life?

(I notice that not only do Lillie and I share some similar perspectives on men and sex in Second Life, but we also share a near complete lack of patience in waiting for everything to rez before taking and posting pictures. Bless her. She also has, however, a penchant for outting people on her blog that I do not share. So be fair warned. She uses condemnations, pics [RL & SL], names, titles, profiles and descriptions of acts. Her last blog post is from December of 2009, so it may be safe to go back into the Adult and Mature waters.)


Edit p.s.:

I see she has another, more current, sex-in-Second Life blog called 2nd Sex that has a posting as recent as December 6, 2010. So if you are chumming the fuck waters of Second Life, beware the watchful stripper in a thong with the flashing camera.




I'm probably gonna go off on a bit of a tangent from your post (and thank you for that), but...

I've noticed, from my own prolific sexual behavior in Second Life, that sliding down that slippery slope to a jaded and uncharitable view of the opposite sex, or I suppose I should say "targeted" sex in order to include all sexual possibilities and preferences, is an occupational (as in "activity in which a person is engaged," not necessarily "professional") hazard. I like to think I do a pretty good job of keeping my perspective and my appreciation of men in general (as a heterosexual female), but the reality is, you can't spend a lot of time engaged in one particular activity and not expect it to have an effect on your personal hard-wiring and that particular activity, casual sex, really skews the sensory input down to something specific and visceral and unfairly unflattering to the larger group being considered. It's just the nature of the beast. I've made a personal choice to actively keep a guarded eye on my own attitudes and not let it completely pervert my thinking, so to speak. All groups of people have assholes and saints and some who are neither but just have their moments.

Lillie and I are both calling people out on their behaviors in our own ways, and while I do hear what you are saying about some justification (hell, I think my own transcripts show some justification, and I did observe her blogging about more serious issues like Adult activities on Mature land as well as public ageplay), I'm not as comfortable with the idea of posting people's full avatar names and pictures and profiles with the behaviors and chat. That's why most of the chat transcripts I post contain scrubbed names like Guy 1 and Guy 2. When I post a pic, I usually either get permission or I scrub the name and identifiers beyond the physical appearance, unless the physical appearance itself is just too much of an identifier.

I have a sex alt. I like the freedom of movement and the anonymity and the ability to experiment and play. I appreciate and respect that for others too. Although, with the two examples I specifically mentioned in Lillie's blog, I can see the value in an "outting" activism, but she's catching regular Joe Wannafuckers in her net with screen prints and such and that makes me twitch.

On the other hand, it did occur to me that someone included in her blog might actually benefit from a reader hitting them up for some casual, meaningless, wannafuck sex. Yeah, I do actually think that way; it's not just how I'm drawn. 

[IMG]


And then every once in a while I meet a man who seems to make a good challenge to the perceptions I'm forming.








Often people will shoot you an IM that simply says, "ASL." A quick Google search will tell you that they are asking for your Age, Sex and Location, and to be clear, your real-life age, sex and location, or as one contributor to the Urban Dictionary helpfully adds, "What stupid people say on chats to learn who you are and where you live so they can come to your house with a chainsaw and kill you."

Lillie Yifu makes references to "ASLFers." I don't know what that is, though it has a meme-like quality running through her blog a la Prok's "FIC," and reminds me of Pep's frequent comments about "EFLers," but I would hazard a guess that it might refer to someone who immediately asks for your Age, Sex, Location and Fantasy or Fetish. Any other guesses? Perhaps Lum and Orfeu actually know and will enlighten us.

When I'm in Second Life on my Lee account, the answer to ASL is quick, real and simple (it's already on my profile anyway): 43, female, Seattle. (Although I think I have just put that I am in my 40s on my profile so I don't have to update the damn thing every time I have another birthday.)

When I'm in Second Life on my sex account, I sometimes give that question just a little more thought and a lot less simple reality, as the answer could be any number of things, including, but not limited to:

a) None of your damn business.
b) If that is important to you, then we are probably not a good play-date match.
c) Whatever I want it to be, female and Fantasyland or perhaps a slight variation...
d) Over 21, female and right here in Second Life... and to entertain myself with a bit of slutty-sounding sarcasm veiled as a coy come on...
e) What do you want it to be, baby?

My observation is that most of the people who ask ASL expect a real First Life answer and that most people who answer it are giving fantasy Second Life answers. It's an interesting disconnect. (Note that I specifically said "most" and not "all" and that I am qualifying it as my personal observation.)

Sometimes I feel I am being incredibly honest and forthcoming when I reply, "over 21, female and right here in Second Life," as indeed, I am, and on more than one level, but the response I usually get is, "Ha, ha, ha."

[IMG]



You go, girl. And thank you for adding the Second Life rez-date age. An excellent cover of my egregious omission.

1+
Female
Second Life

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