Opening qualifier. I'm talking about sex. Not long-term romance, but casual sex and mostly of the cyber variety, although many of the same principles apply to both LTR and RL. My focus here is on casual cybersex. From the point of view of a heterosexual female, 'cuz, that's what I am. The principles also apply to other genders and orientations. No really. They do. Check 'em out and see.
Getting someone to have sex with you is like making a sale. Scratch that. It is making a sale. So knowledge and application of sales strategies can up your game BIG TIME. Ignore them at your horny peril.
A typical sales pitch cycle might go a little like this:
♦ The opener. An initial benefit statement or question.
♦ Probing, questioning and listening.
♦ Providing customized features, advantages and benefits to your service based on the probing, questioning and listening.
♦ Surfacing and overcoming objections.
♦ Closing the deal and asking for the business.
♦ Follow up and getting repeat business and referrals.
Silently standing in a sex sim with your cock out might get you cyberlaid, but not nearly with the same frequency as the guys who speak, is in saying something in text or voice in Local Chat or IM.
Psychically beaming your wishes to the hot babe avatar standing next to the St. John's Cross has an equal success rate. (Very, very low, in case that needed further explanation.)
The opener should be appealing and not off-putting or conversation-ending. I know this might seem obvious, but in practice, it's more rare than it should be. For example, "I'm bored," and "I'm tired," and "Meh," are not come-hither catnip lines for sexy cyberkitties. Your malaise does not make the ladies swoon or beg for more. There's an old saying in the sales world, "Fake it 'til you make it." So if you are bored or tired, keep it to yourself and act "as if." Act as if you are happy and horny and feelin' your oats, 'cuz then you might soon be, ya know, actually feeling happy, horny and your oats. Or she might be feeling your oats for you.
And under the heading of ineffective opening lines or gambits for hook-ups in Second Life...
☞ Random, repetitive TPs with no preamble of any kind. You can go fishing, but you've got to bait the hook.
☞ Standing on the bed or the actual avatars of two people who are already having sex and then hopping in the moment one of them changes positions or just standing on top of them waiting your turn. This is where you are lucky you are not in First Life or a weapon-enabled sim. You'd rightly get your ass kicked.
☞ IMing people who are obviously in the middle of coitus and attempting to engage in a long conversation that is all about you, your day and your sexual needs. Continuing to IM said people with, "Are you done yet? Are you done now? Now? How about now? Finished? Done? My turn?" is equally ineffective.
Delete these from your repertoire if you want to up your game.
Reposts. LeeHere Absent, Feb 15, 2011 http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/thats-what-she-said.772/page-2#post-23991
LeeHere Absent, Feb 15, 2011 http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/thats-what-she-said.772/page-2#post-23992 LeeHere Absent, Feb 19, 2011http://gotvirtual.net/community/threads/thats-what-she-said.772/page-8#post-24916
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